The Dark, The Cute And The Idiot
by Matsuu Kurayami
Summary: Keitaro is going to the Hinata Inn... but this time he's not alone, He's going with his friends, an OC named Darc and his Girlfriend Coco! Enjoy and please don't flame.
1. Arrival

Hello Readers, This is my first EVER fan fiction so please go easy on me. Anyways in this fanfic there will be an OC named Darc Farron… and Coco Bandicoot (I`m changing her last name for this fanfic to make sense). Warning: there will be lemons in later chapters I will have warnings in any chapter with lemons so keep your eyes peeled. I do not own Love Hina or Crash Bandicoot as if I did… well what I would do is best left unsaid ;). ENJOY! XD

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Chapter 1: Arriving

Darc`s P.O.V.

It was a nice day as me and my girlfriend Coco, and Keitaro all made our way to Kei`s Grandmother`s place… after, of course, getting kicked out of our houses and for all different reasons… let me explain. My name is Darc Farron, age 19, I am 6' 2", spiked hair (think of Cloud Strife`s hair, except black), black shirt with the symbol for darkness on it, black cargo pants, and black fingerless gloves, I also carry a sword (Like the knights of the medieval age), with a blunt blade, named Dākupesuto (Dark Plague), I got my licence to carry a sword in public 5 years ago after… never mind. Anyways, onto my girlfriend Coco Rin, age 16, 5 feet tall, she`s smart (IQ = 300), beautiful and adorably cute, as well as the reason I got kicked out of my house but I'll explain later ok? Good… she's currently wearing lots of clothing as she doesn't like people to see her now a days… anyway she's got the most beautiful shade of cerulean coloured eyes you'll ever see and she's got blond hair in a big ponytail (think of her original look) and a futuristic bow staff called Sukarukurasshā (Skull Crusher), she got her licence to carry it in public around the same time as I got to carry my blade. Anyways onto Keitaro, He comes from the Urashima bloodline, age 19, 5' 7", and has THE WORST LUCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD! I am serious he is accident prone like it's his job… any ways all of us have something in common… we are trying for Tokyo University, Keitaro is a 2-year ronin (student that has failed the entrance exams, also why he was kicked out of his house) I'm a 1st year as I took an extra year to prep and Coco has yet to take it as she is following my example of prepping. Ah, looks like we arrived well time to go…

Main P.O.V.

"That's a lot of stairs…" Darc pointed out.

"Yeah, thanks Captain Obvious", Coco playfully replied as she, along with Keitaro and Darc, started up the stairs.

"Well think of it this way, at least you won't have two won't have to go for your jog today", Keitaro mentioned.

"Point taken", Darc chuckled as they made their way to the top.

"Wow", that was everybody's reaction to the beautiful mansion that was known as the Hinata Inn...

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So review, tell me what you thought of it so far and please don't flame or troll as I doubt you would like that… Kurayami, melding into the shadows!


	2. First Impressions

I don't need to do the disclaimer again do I? Good, because I wasn't going to… XD Enjoy! (p.s. Coco was able to skip a grade… why? Because she's just that damn good! XD)

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Chapter 2: First Impressions

Main P.O.V.

… After gawking at the Inn for a few minutes the trio goes inside to find… Not a damn soul, it was slightly unnerving.

"Hello? Is anyone home? Grandma, It's your Grandson Keitaro!" Keitaro shouted.

"Maybe she left the Inn, changed it into an all-girls dormitory and went on a tour to all the hot springs of the world?...", Coco suggested (foreshadowing FTW! XD).

"Nah", both Keitaro and Darc said after thinking for a moment.

The trio decided to look around and split into two group(ish)s: Keitaro as one and Darc with Coco as the other. Keitaro found the manager's suite and put his bag there while Darc and Coco left theirs in the lobby… and stayed in said lobby with Coco straddling Darc and kissing him passionately.

Keitaro found the hot springs and got in… and a few minutes later somebody comes in and lo and behold … It's a really hot towel clad red-headed chick who proceeded to say " Hey Kitsune, have my breasts gotten any bigger?", while showing her breasts, "but they're still not as big as yours… let me have a feel", she then proceeds to grab 'Kitsune' and ends up grabbing big, long object, "…" she puts her glasses on just as Keitaro leaves the hot springs.

After Keitaro left the springs he put his clothes on, opened the door to the hall way and ran right in between something warm, soft and rou… 'Aw crap', were Keitaro's thoughts as he looked up at a woman whose face kind of reminded him of a fox.

"Kitsune why did you lea-", the red-haired girl from earlier was cut off by the sight of Keitaro in between 'Kitsune's cleavage "WHAT DO THINK YOU ARE DOING, YOU PERVERT!" she screamed as she smashed poor Keitaro with her 'Atomic Fist of Doom' and Keitaro smashed into the wall and somehow started running.

"Coco… Did you hear something?" Darc asked

"Yeah… Kind of sounded like something crashing into a wall…" Coco responded

"Or somebody…" Darc added

"… KEITARO!" they both concluded as they rushed towards the source of the sound

'OMG! THESE GIRLS ARE COMPLETELY INSANE, I'M JUST HERE TO VISIT GRANNY, BUT THEY WON'T LISTEN TO ME!' Keitaro shouted in his mind as the 2 girls from earlier plus one more - that had a BIG FUCKING BAZOOKA – where chasing him.

"What's with all the noise, I can't meditate like thi-", she cuts herself off as she sees Keitaro, "A VILE MALE HERE TOO PEEK ON US? I CANNOT ALLOW YOU TO LIVE! **ROCK-SPLITTING SWORD!**" She screams as she sends a wave of Ki at poor Keitaro.

'WHAT THE FUCK!' were Keitaro's thoughts just before the wave hit him and sent him into the lobby… in front of Coco and Darc.

"What the hell happened to you?" Darc asked

"You don't want to know." Keitaro responded as he got up

"There he i- MORE OF THEM!" Screamed the red-head as she ran into the lobby only to see Coco and Darc (she thinks Coco is a guy by the way she is dressed)

Coco looks at Darc, Darc looks back, they nod their heads and bring out their weapons.

"So they think their tough just because they have weapons, WELL THEY THOUGHT WRONG" the red-haired girl screams as she and the kendo chick charge Coco and Darc in that order.

Coco knocks out Red-hair and Darc disarms as well as knocks out Kendo much to the surprise of the others.

"What's going on here?" a voice inquires,

"Aunt Haru-" Keitaro is cut off by a fan hitting his head,

"Just call me Haruka" Haruka deadpans,

"Yo Haruka, how's the Teashop doing?" Darc greets,

"Hello Haruka-sensei" Coco says,

"HUH?" everyone save for Keitaro, Darc, Coco and Haruka asks.

"Everyone this is my nephew Keitaro Urashima, His friend Darc Farron along with Darc's Girlfriend Coco Rin…"

"Huh? That's a girl… sorry we thought you were a guy by the way you're dressed and apparent lack of breasts…", Kitsune pointed out, Coco started to tremble… a sure bad sign, Kitsune would have continued, but she had a sudden appointment with the floor, compliments of Sukarukurasshā.

"DON'T EVER! COMMENT! ON! MY! BREAST SIZE!" , Coco shouted with her eyes looking demonic (Think about Motoko's sister's eyes when they fought), "Ok?" Coco said with her eyes back to normal, "Because that's your only warning" she continues in a voice of warning.

This was everyone's (save for Darc and Haruka) thoughts afterwards 'note to self: don't make remarks about her flat chest' (yes she has a flat chest so sue me… on second thought please don't. XD)

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Well what did you think of this chapter? Remember I don't own anything except my OC, review and comment. But please don't flame… because if you DO flame you won't get a cookie. XD Kurayami, melding into the shadows!


	3. Introductions and Managers

Hello… I'm sorry about the delay… I couldn't think of how I wanted the story to continue… BUT NOW I HAVE! XD Anyways I don't own Love Hina or Crash Bandicoot. Enjoy!

Chapter 3: Introductions and Managers

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Naru's P.O.V.

As I woke up I found myself on the floor with an aching stomach for some reason, and then I remembered that I got my ass handed to me by some dude with an awesome-looking pole (such an innuendo XD).

Motoko's P.O.V.

I awakened to pain and the floor and it came back to me, I was defeated by a male with a rather large sword (innuendo XD).

Darc's P.O.V.

I watched as the Naru (red-head) and Motoko (Kendo) and said "Glad you could join us, now tell me why you attacked me and my Girlfriend."

"Wait, that's a girl?" Both Naru and Motoko asked,

"Of course I'm a girl," Coco deadpanned

Both Naru and Motoko were probably going to make a comment on her chest size when they noticed Kitsune (Fox-Face) shaking her head as if to say 'don't do it'. Fortunately they got the message and shut themselves up.

"Now to introduce ourselves, I am Darc Farron and this is my girlfriend Coco Rin along with my best friend Keitaro Urashima and Kei's Grandma invited us over-" I started

"NO WAY, YOU ARE NOT STAYING!" Naru shouted/cut off with rage in her eyes

"I agree with Naru, I will not allow vile males to continue to walk around here as they please!" Motoko exclaimed

"Well too bad as you both have no say in the matter so if you don't like it then you can leave, we are old lady Hina's guests not to mention that Kei is her Grandson so all in all he has more right to be here than all of you combined, as for me and Coco, she has always treated and considered us family," I explained while giving heated glares to Naru and Motoko, "besides we just need a place to stay so that we can get on our feet, Ok?"

"NO, MEANS NO!" Naru continued to yell as I covered my ears wincing slightly at the volume of her shrieks.

I then look to my side at Coco too see her with that evil little smirk of hers and all of a sudden I get a very ominous feeling from her, "What are you scheming?" I ask her in a whisper

"Nothing" She whispers back and I don't believe her as every time I see that little smirk something rather bad happens to the one it's directed at and I could tell that her targets were Naru and Motoko.

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So tell me what you think of this chapter I really want to know what you all think of my story so please review and comment but remember don't flame me or I'll set the Hina girls after you XD (I wish DX).

**ATTENTION! **I've got a pairing for Keitaro and I want your opinion on what turn their relationship will take so visit my poll and answer truthfully, ok? Kurayami, melding into the shadows!


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